between blinks--

at peace, with sore eyes

a few little joys to share:
winning the drama contest
making a choice concerning the class trip
a few days closer to vacation

i'm reminded every moment,
how lucky we are surrounded by music
it floats, all around

and then i think,
"where would i stand 10 years from now?"

my eyes are still sore,
but they don't sting as much
fading, faded.

on sleepless nights

like jungho, i borrow the title from tuhin.
seems like we've all been afflicted with the lack of sleep
crawled up to bed at 10:47pm,
and now spitting out words of frustration at 12:32am
augh, feels terrible knowing you need the rest,
but can't
my body's protesting against-- i have no idea what.

but yesterday,
a most eerily beautiful scene played across my eyes,
all i see was the interlaced fingers,
the slow sway of their intimate embrace,
the subtle bliss across their dimly lit face--
where i'd like to be someday

that the situation should feel so familiar was a little disturbing,
just a little.

parched lips*

*pause*
how to put my thoughts down--?

i'm at loss for words.
i've never been eloquent,
at least, not in the way i wish to be.

*another pause*

i did a self-portrait today
it looked-- solemn, i guess
pensive
reflecting my inner sentiments

if i smile, i want it to be sincere,
otherwise it'd look ugly,
miserably horrible.

0:4

was the score for the game today,
with us losing.
ah well, perhaps we could've done better,
with more practice.
and this is the first time we played as a team
think we need to "collaborate" more, hehe.
but we had fun,
tiring, but fun.
and many came to watch,
wished that we had a better game to show,
but who cares,
this isn't the only game.

now,
task: to keep the ball from running all over the place!
is definitely gonna take time to master

end note.

haven't felt this-- carefree for a long time,
though i'm busy with drama, soccer, and my studies.

feels great to be running on the field,
concentrating on controling the ball,
meeting new friends who share common interests.

a negative point: the heat!
ack! the sun's aiming to burn us alive!

taipei's weather has a thing for extremities:
heavy rain
or
scorching sun

afterallthefallentears:

it soothes me a great deal to see the quiet happiness back in your life,
and it doesn't matter much anymore,
that i'm not the reason for it--
as long as the smile stays

perhaps,
i should end it all by telling you

and move on

but the doubt lingers
can i accept another?

can i feel for another,
without the guilt of thinking him as second to you?

i'm willing to try,
so please please please,
be strong,
and not waver when i see you.

"Across the Universe" --Fiona Apple

*blink*

it comes to a point to which i can't feel
that i'd rather sink
than struggle

"Think of Me" --Sarah Brightman

affairs of the heart

woke up sprawled at the bottom of a canyon,
pitch dark-- even her fingers eluded her sight
will not seeing allow her to forget the face?

***

how is it that i still yearn after so long?
that flickering ember should have long ceased to be.
should have gone out when a particulary strong gust of wind blew past.
should have relieved me from--

"There was this woman, a [seductively] beautiful one that meant so much to him; that would always mean so much to him.

There was this girl, but in that split second there was only enough breath in his lungs for one woman."

--180º Spins, Twists and Turns by Iram

i read this and my heart constricts,
because she's the "woman"
and i may not even be the "girl"

***

this silly girl won't learn and wake up from her daze.
but no one sees how love wells up and drowns her
and how she desperately tries to keep those lips smiling